I just can't believe it has been year.
I remember laying back in my chair while I was pregnant, and feeling him move and just KNOWING he was the most amazing person. I talked to him, rubbed my belly, and thought about him constantly. Wanting to see him so much, but scared, too.
The day he was born, I had so much hope, but I was so worried. It felt right to hope, I felt like everything in the end would be okay.
After he was born, it was a struggle to maintain my composure. I remember the second night in the hospital, I was a mess.
But it still felt right to hope.
That first week after he was born was an incredible experience, one I never wish to repeat, but at the same time I'll never regret it. So much was out of our hands. If you know me, you know one of my biggest flaws is my persistent need to do everything myself, no matter how much I'm over my head. It was so hard to be unable to do anything.
5 days after my c-section, if anyone had been around to see, they would have thought I was crazy. I did laundry and cleaned the kitchen and bathroom floors on my hands and knees, just to have something to do. I wasn't cleared to drive just yet, so I couldn't go to the hospital to see Evan while Carl was at work. But by golly, I was going to accomplish something.
And now, a year later, I have my hands full, and my heart is happy. Evan has overcome more obstacles than most people will ever experience in just his first year. What can I say? He's my hero, he is my inspiration, and I know that my life is forever enriched by having such an amazing child.
I cant help but think I am incredibly lucky to be given the opportunity to raise him, to love him, and to see him grow up. Everything we've been through, although difficult at the time, has been just a side-note in comparison to the great pride, joy and admiration I have for my son.
He makes every day just a little brighter. Who could ask for more?
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